How to Know if You Are Bingeing-and How to Stop
(By Dr. Colleen Reichmann, owner and clinical director of Wildflower Therapy, Philadelphia PA)
Binge eating can feel incredibly isolating. Many people who struggle with it describe the cycle as a secret they carry-moments when food just seems to take over, followed by waves of guilt, shame, or confusion. If you’ve wondered whether what you’re experiencing counts as “bingeing,” you’re NOT alone. And if you’ve tried program after program (Overeaters Anonymous (OA), strict diet plans, or “reset” challenges) only to find yourself back in the same place, you’re not alone in that either. And there are very valid, research-backed reasons why these programs failed you (hear that shift in language. You did NOT fail them.)
At Wildflower Therapy in Philadelphia, we specialize in therapy for eating disorders, including binge eating disorder (BED). Our work has shown us again and again that bingeing isn’t about “lack of willpower” or “being bad with food.” Instead, it’s almost always connected to restriction-sometimes obvious, like dieting, and sometimes subtle, like the psychological rules we created around food, or rules that we absorbed from our parents as children. The hopeful news is that healing is possible, especially when you work with a therapist who truly understands eating disorders.
In this post, we’ll cover:
What bingeing really means (and how to know if it applies to you)
Why restrictive approaches like OA often backfire
How restriction fuels bingeing (including the role of psychological restriction)
Why therapy with eating disorder specialists is the most effective way to stop binge eating
Steps you can begin today if you’re struggling
What Does“Bingeing”Even Mean?
The word “binge” gets thrown around casually “I binged that Netflix show” or “I binged on chips last night.” But binge eating disorder is very different from just eating more than usual. Clinically, bingeing refers to:
Eating a large amount of food in a short period of time (often more than most people would eat under similar circumstances)
Feeling a sense of loss of control during the episode
Experiencing distress afterward, such as guilt, shame, or physical discomfort
It’s important to note: bingeing isn’t defined by the type of food or even the exact amount. It’s about the experience itself-the intensity, the loss of control, and the emotional aftermath.
Some people binge only occasionally. Others may binge several times per week. If you notice a cycle of eating in a way that feels out of control and then trying to “make up for it” through restricting or over-exercising, that’s often a sign you may be stuck in the binge-restrict cycle.
Why Restrictive Approaches Like OA Often Fail
For decades, many people have turned to programs like Overeaters Anonymous (OA) for help with binge eating. OA is modeled after the 12-step approach used for addictions like alcohol or drugs. It often emphasizes strict abstinence from certain foods, rigid rules, and a moral framework around eating.
Here’s the very basic problem here: food is not like alcohol. You can’t simply abstain from eating. When programs frame certain foods as “bad” or promote strict abstinence, what usually happens is:
Increased Restriction – You try to cut out “trigger foods” or entire categories of food.
Rebound Cravings – Your brain and body respond to restriction with stronger urges for those exact foods.
Binge Episodes – Eventually, the pressure builds until you “give in,” often leading to a binge.
Shame and Starting Over – You feel like you’ve failed, recommit to being stricter, and the cycle repeats.
This approach can keep people stuck for years. Instead of helping you build a healthy, flexible relationship with food, it reinforces black-and-white thinking: “I’m good when I resist, bad when I give in.” That moralization of food deepens shame, and shame itself often fuels bingeing.
At Wildflower Therapy, we see many clients who have tried OA or similar programs and left feeling defeated. When we shift away from restriction and instead focus on healing the underlying patterns (yes including restriction itself), things begin to change.
How Restriction Fuels Bingeing
One of the most important truths about binge eating is this: bingeing is almost always a reaction to restriction.
Restriction can take different forms:
Physical restriction: Dieting, calorie-counting, skipping meals, avoiding entire food groups.
Psychological restriction: Telling yourself you “shouldn’t” eat certain foods, feeling guilty for enjoying food, or planning to “make up for it” with exercise or fasting.
The body and mind don’t always differentiate between physical and psychological restriction. If you’re telling yourself that cookies are “bad,” even if you still allow yourself to eat them, you’re creating an environment where shame and urgency take over. That urgency looks like: “I better eat them now before I get back on track tomorrow,” and is what often sets the stage for a binge.
Here’s how the cycle usually looks:
Restriction (physical or mental): “I’ll be good today and eat clean.”
Deprivation and craving: “I want something sweet but I shouldn’t.”
Bingeing: The cravings intensify until you eat the food in large amounts, often quickly.
Guilt and shame: “I blew it. I’ll start over tomorrow.”
Back to restriction: The cycle begins again.
This is why most diet-based or abstinence-based approaches don’t work for binge eating disorder. They actually strengthen the very cycle they claim to solve.
Why Therapy Is the Best Approach for Binge Eating
So if restriction doesn’t work, what does?
The most effective treatment for binge eating disorder is therapy with a specialist who understands the complexities of eating disorders. At Wildflower Therapy in Philadelphia, our therapists are trained specifically in actual evidence-based approaches to eating disorders, such as:
CBT-E (Enhanced Cognitive Behavioral Therapy): Helps identify and change unhelpful thoughts and behaviors related to food, body image, and self-worth.
DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy): Teaches skills to manage emotions, reduce impulsivity, and build healthier coping mechanisms.
HAES® (Health at Every Size) and Intuitive Eating frameworks: Promote a compassionate, non-diet approach to food, body, and health.
Why is therapy so powerful for binge eating disorder? Because bingeing isn’t just about food—it’s about the underlying emotions, beliefs, and coping strategies that drive it. That’s why Binge Eating Disorder needs to be treated in exactly the same spirit as all of the other eating disorders. As a society, we havent sent people who restrict to “undereaters anonymous,” because restriction to the level of needing support is best addressed using clinical tools, and research-backed therapeutic support. Binge eating should be taken just as seriously. And, because it is so often tied to restriction, therapy needs to address restriction in just as serious of a manner as traiditonal therapy for things like anorexia does. Appropriate therapy for binge eating should addresses the role of restriction in maintaining bingeing as well as the impact of body image and weight stigma. Therapists should provide tools for emotional regulation, and helpe people to reframe their lenses around eating to create more of a flexible, shame-free relationship with food
Unlike restrictive programs, therapy doesn’t set you up to fail. Instead, it helps you build a sustainable, compassionate path forward.
What Healing from Binge Eating Looks Like
Recovery doesn’t happen overnight, but it is absolutely possible. Here are some of the shifts people experience when working with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders:
No longer feeling trapped in the binge-restrict cycle
Being able to eat foods you once thought were “off-limits” without spiraling into a binge
Experiencing less guilt and shame around food
Feeling more in control of your eating without rigid rules
Learning that over-eating is a part of the human experience with food sometimes, and releasing intense shame and self loathing around this when you do experience it.
Learning healthier ways to cope with stress, sadness, or anxiety
Healing means reclaiming your life from food rules, binges, and shame. It means being able to share a meal with loved ones without fear. It means reconnecting with your body’s cues instead of fighting against them.
First Steps if You’re Struggling
If you think you might be bingeing, here are a few steps you can take right now:
Release the shame. You are not weak, broken, or lacking willpower. Binge eating is a coping mechanism, not a character flaw.
Notice your restriction. Ask yourself: Am I skipping meals? Avoiding certain foods? Feeling guilty when I eat? These are signs of restriction, which often fuel bingeing.
Consider support. You do not have to do this alone. Working with a therapist who understands binge eating disorder can make a world of difference.
Start with nourishment. Eating regular meals and snacks throughout the day can help stabilize your body and reduce the urge to binge (the vast majority of bingeing happens in the evenings)
Be gentle with yourself. Healing is not linear. Remember that food is an ongoing, unfolding journey. All human beings eat emotionally, and all humans eat past fullness sometimes.
How Wildflower Therapy Can Help
At Wildflower Therapy in Philadelphia, we specialize in eating disorder therapy, including binge eating disorder. Our team understands the deep shame, frustration, and exhaustion that can come with binge eating, and and we’re here to help you break free.
Whether you’re seeking therapy for binge eating in Philadelphia or near the Main Line, and want to seek help in person, or are located anywhere in PA, VA, NJ, DE, OH, SC, VT, FL, or MA and are open to virtual support, our practice provides a safe, compassionate space for healing. We tailor our approach to your unique needs, using evidence-based therapy combined with warmth and understanding.
You don’t have to live in the binge-restrict cycle. With the right support, freedom with food is possible.
Final Thoughts
If you’re wondering whether your experiences count as bingeing, the answer may not lie in the number of cookies or slices of pizza-it lies in how you feel. If you’re stuck in a cycle of loss of control, guilt, and restriction, it’s worth reaching out for help.
Restrictive approaches like OA may promise freedom, but for most people, they reinforce the very patterns that keep bingeing alive. The most effective path forward is therapy with eating disorder specialists who understand the complexities of binge eating disorder.
At Wildflower Therapy in Philadelphia, we’ve seen countless clients move from shame and struggle to peace and freedom. You deserve that, too.
If you’re ready to take the first step, reach out today to schedule your free consultation call. That call might just be the first step in creating a completely new, more peaceful relationship with food and your body.