Do I Need an Eating Disorder Therapist? 10 Signs It’s Time to Reach Out

Written by Dr. Colleen Reichmann, owner and clinical director of Wildflower Therapy

“Maybe it’s not bad enough?!”

If you’ve ever Googled “Do I need an eating disorder therapist?” there’s a good chance you’ve also said some version of those words to yourself.

You tell yourself that other people have it worse-that you’re eating every day, so it can’t be that serious. Or maybe you’ve convinced yourself that you’re just “trying to be healthy” or that basically everyone has disordered eating in this society, so why make a big deal out of it?

We hear these thoughts every single week from the people who reach out to us. But the truth is, most people don’t reach out because they’re absolutely certain they have an eating disorder. They reach out because they’re exhausted (and because they realize that googling “do I have an eating disorder” is, in and of itself, a sign that some help is probably not a bad idea.)

If you’re wondering whether it’s time to talk to an eating disorder therapist-pull up a chair. This is for you, my friend.

First, you don’t need a diagnosis to deserve help.

This is probably the biggest misconception we see. You do not need someone to officially diagnose you with anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder, ARFID, or another eating disorder before reaching out. You don’t have to be underweight. You don’t have to be hospitalized. You don’t have to hit some invisible rock bottom.

Therapy isn’t reserved for people who are “sick enough.”(Sick enough,” what does that mean anyway? I always want to make everyone operationally define it, because it feels like it’s mainly a mirage.)

Therapy is for people whose relationship with food, exercise, or their body has started taking more from their life than they’d like. So if that’s you, and you’re wondering whether your struggles count, that’s reason enough to have a conversation.

10 signs it might be time to reach out to an eating disorder therapist

1. Food takes up more mental space than you want it to.

Maybe you’re constantly planning your next meal, or replaying what you ate yesterday.

Maybe every social event begins with wondering what food will be there- with you googling menus and feeling that uptick in anxiety when you start perusing them.

People often assume eating disorders are about eating. But in reality, they’re often about thinking. If food and body thoughts are crowding out your ability to focus on work, relationships, parenting, school, or simply enjoying your day, you do NOT have to keep carrying that alone.

2. You’ve started organizing your life around food or exercise.

You’ve skipped dinners with friends because the restaurant felt too unpredictable. You’ve turned down vacations because you couldn’t control the food. You panic when your workout routine changes.

Little by little, you’ve noticed that life has started to become… smaller?

One of the clearest signs that something deserves attention isn’t anything to do with what you’re eating- it’s about what you’re missing.

3. You feel guilty after eating.

Guilt has a way of making eating feel like something that needs to be earned or made up for.

If meals regularly end with thoughts like:

“I shouldn’t have eaten that.”

“I’ll make up for it tomorrow.”

“I need to burn this off.”

…well then, at the risk of sounding like a cliché eating disorder psychologist, it’s worth exploring where those beliefs came from!

Eating should never require punishment. Eating should never require punishment. Eating should never require punishment.

4. You’re always wondering if you’re “doing food right.”

Many people don’t realize how much anxiety they carry around eating until they describe a normal day.

Questions like:

“Is this healthy enough?”

“Did I eat too much?”

“Should I skip dinner because I had dessert?”

“What’s the healthiest option?”

…can become so automatic that they feel normal.

But constant uncertainty around eating isn’t something you have to live with. Therapy can ease this experience, even if you question if that can be true for you!

5. People close to you have expressed concern.

Sometimes loved ones notice changes before we do.

Maybe someone has mentioned:

• you’ve lost weight

• you seem more anxious around food

• you’re exercising constantly

• you’re avoiding meals

• you’re becoming more isolated

Even if you disagree with them, their concern can be worth exploring with someone who understands eating disorders. Sometimes they can be the mirror to see what is too hard for us to notice on our own.

6. You don’t think you’re “sick enough.”

This deserves its own section because it’s one of the most common things we hear.

Almost every eating disorder convinces people they’re the exception.

“I’m not thin enough.”

“I still eat.”

“I don’t purge.”

“I only binge sometimes.”

“I’m functioning.”

If you’ve been waiting to become “bad enough” before asking for help, you may be waiting for a finish line that keeps moving. Early intervention is one of the strongest predictors of recovery. You do NOT have to prove you’re struggling before you deserve support.

7. Your body image is affecting your quality of life.

Body image isn’t just about disliking your appearance.

It can look like:

• avoiding photographs

• canceling plans because of your body

• changing outfits repeatedly

• spending hours checking mirrors

• constantly comparing yourself to others

• believing life will begin after your body changes

If your body has become something you feel at war with every day, therapy can help you build something different.

8. You’re trying really hard, but nothing sticks.

Maybe you’ve read the books, and listened to the podcasts. You listened to that one post on social media where that therapist suggested deleting calorie-tracking apps.

You know the things, logically- but nothing emotionally has changed. You aren’t failing.

Please hear me when I say that you aren’t failing. Eating disorders are complex mental health conditions, not problems of willpower. If this wasn’t the case, why do high power attorneys, surgeons, and incredibly intelligent people of all backgrounds sometimes find themselves in inpatient levels of eating disorder treatment?

Most of the time, recovery requires another person helping you untangle what you can’t see from the inside.

9. Your relationships are being affected.

Eating disorders rarely stay contained to food. They can affect dating, parenting, friendships, intimacy, family dinners, travel, holidays, and even your ability to be mentally present with the people you love.

Many of our clients tell us they didn’t realize how much space the eating disorder was taking up until recovery gave them that space back.

10. Part of you wants help, even if another part is terrified.

This may be the biggest sign of all.

Listen-you seriously do NOT have to feel 100% ready, ok?

In fact, the exception to the rule of the people who reach out to us would be the person who is “all in.”

It’s completely normal to want recovery while also fearing it. To imagine life without the eating disorder while grieving the idea of letting it go. To hope for something different while wondering if it’s possible.

You don’t have to resolve that ambivalence before therapy.

That’s exactly what therapy is for.

What happens when you reach out?

One of the biggest fears people have is that they’re going to be judged or pressured.

Our goal isn’t to force you into recovery before you’re ready. It’s simply to understand your story.

When you contact Wildflower Therapy, our clinical director will talk with you about what’s been happening, what you’re struggling with, and what kind of therapist would feel best for you. We’ll help determine whether outpatient therapy is the right fit, answer your questions, and connect you with a clinician whose expertise matches your needs.

You don’t have to know exactly what’s wrong before you call, or have the right words. We will steer the conversation. Zero pressure. You just need to reach out. We got the rest.

Eating disorder therapy in Philadelphia and the Main Line

At Wildflower Therapy, our psychologists and therapists specialize in treating eating disorders, disordered eating, body image concerns, ARFID, binge eating disorder, anorexia, bulimia, and co-occurring anxiety, OCD, perfectionism, maternal mental health, infertility, and trauma.

We provide eating disorder therapy in our Philadelphia and Devon offices, and offer virtual therapy throughout Pennsylvania. Whether you’re a college student, parent, professional, athlete, a therapist yourself, or someone who’s been struggling quietly for years, you deserve care that is compassionate, evidence-based, and free from judgment.

You don’t have to wait until things get worse.

If you take one thing away from this article, let it be this:

The question isn’t whether you’re “sick enough.”

The question is whether your relationship with food, your body, or exercise is causing enough pain that you wish it felt different.

If the answer is yes, we’d love to help. Reach out today to schedule your free consultation call.

Recovery doesn’t begin when everything falls apart. Sometimes it begins the moment you stop trying to convince yourself you don’t deserve support.